Saturday, sunup. 

T minus 24 hours and a long list of tasks. 

I woke up dreaming about our congressman Chaffetz who is in a dark room talking through an opaque curtain to an unknown person, whose face can’t be seen, only his silhouette . 

 The unseen man represents the Koch Brothers, who symbolize corporate America’s strangle hold on our  political system.

Dark Voice: You said it was urgent. We’re not supposed to meet like this. (the scene in The Blacklist I watched on Hulu last night comes to mind.)  You know how important it is that we’re never seen together. “Mission Critical” you said. I hope so.

Chaffetz: I’m so sorry. I know you’re busy. But I’m really struggling.

Dark Voice: How could you be struggling? All you need to worry about is getting re-elected and I’ll see to that. You know the drill.

Chaffetz. I know. I know and I appreciate how much easier it is to be a career politician, thanks to you. But….

Dark Voice: No buts. Get to the point.

Chaffetz: I’m struggling because some days I can’t believe what I hear myself saying…I don’t believe what I hear coming out of my mouth.

Dark Voice: You don’t get paid to believe. That was the deal. We’ll believe for you.

Chaffetz: I mean this stuff about Hillary’s emails…can I drop that? And Bengazi, how long do I need to beat that dead horse? And state control of Federal Lands and voting against any minimum wage increases, and sacking medicare….I wasn’t raised this way…

Dark Voice: Are you finished? 

Chaffetz: And climate change...what if.....?

Dark Voice: Are you questioning me? I didn't think so. Are you finished now?

Chaffetz: (bent over, head in hands) I guess. Thanks for listening.

Dark Voice: Mike Lee and Scott Brown—they’re smart. They don’t have a problem. You need to take a hard look in the mirror. If you’re not up to this, we’ll find someone who is.

Chaffetz: Yes sir. I know sir. I'm sorry. I’ll try harder sir.

I think it was Chaffetz in my dream because of all the Utah Politicians I’ve met in Washington, he seemed like the one who might at some point think for himself. He seemed attentive when we talked to him about wilderness, and open to the possibility of a creative approach to bridging the gaps. But that was a while ago. I can't imagine that any of these people don't, at some point question what they have to do or say to stay loyal to their party and their source of funding. 

My task list includes finishing a story I'm writing that will become the introduction to a collector's book commemorating the 25th Anniversary of Back of Beyond Books, Moab's great bookstore. What I love about writing is that yes, to begin requires a compelling idea or reason or assignment. I struggle and fuss and get up and down (I know that a desk chair with a seat belt would help me), but once I've managed to tap into that creative space, I find the real reason. In this case, I'm learning that I've not been bold enough; that there is much more I need to say regardless of how uncomfortable it makes me. 

Turn down the water heater

Hook up the swamp cooler

Water the plants

Boil some road eggs

Shower

Leave Mercedes a note

Chop wood

Carry water